Posted by: zephaniah317 | September 27, 2007

Concerning God’s Big-Ness, and Crickets

God’s so…well, big.  And I’m so small.  But His revelations to me aren’t.

I was really struggling today with my previous post.  And again, all the feelings that come with a flesh that craves the spotlight and the glory and the recognition.  And a flesh that also feels as if I have to be perfect.

Several thoughts come to mind, so I’m not going to try to put them in any order or eloquence.

I think I’m finally starting to understand Jesus.  I don’t have to be perfect.  Jesus took care of all that.  I’ve known it, but never really felt that way about myself.  Trusting Him, I mean.

One way God is teaching me to be humble with my gifts and talents:  He’s…like I said before…big.  A lot bigger than me.  Why should I even try to emulate Him or get any glory that should be His?  I mean, He’s not gonna flip out on me or anything if I do, I don’t think.  But, it’s so…futile.

So put the last two thoughts together, and you get my conflict.  One teaching, the one I grew up with, which says I have to perform and gain God’s acceptance and love, and the new teaching, the friggin’ truth (!), which says, are ya KIDDIN’ me?!?!?  He’s God.  How can I measure up to HIM?!?!  I could get all the glory on this earth for myself, and still not even begin to measure up to His greatness.

So, as I was trying to make myself smaller in my own mind today and be humble in His presence and get the right perspective, a thought came to mind:  How’s about instead of trying to abase yourself, just look up and see how big I AM?  Isn’t that easier and healthier?  So I did.  And it was easier.  And my heart feels better.  And I have a better perspective of myself and others because of it.  It’s been a good day.

Now, can someone please tell me why I’m getting an average of almost 10 hits a day on my camelback cricket post from this past January?  Is there a science project out there or something I don’t know about?  If you’re one of the lurkers, and you know why I’m getting all these hits, could you please post a comment on the reason?  I’m really curious.  Thanks!

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Responses

  1. “…just look up and see how big I AM? Isn’t that easier and healthier? So I did. And it was easier. And my heart feels better. And I have a better perspective of myself and others because of it. It’s been a good day.”

    Loved that!

    Thanks for sharing your talks with your Father.

  2. So my comment is not about your post right now, but yes I am at least alive. I have been looking for a new place…moving in a couple of weeks. So every spare moment has been put into either looking for a place or trying to make extra money for having to get a new place. Which has left absolutely no time to pack for the new place. But it’s cool…I like to rush pack. 🙂 Hope you’re good. I’ll be back with “something” later. Presumably.


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